I Am Still in Love With My Ex
"I'm still in love with my ex.
" Are you going around saying that, with all the attendant misery and feelings of failure that come with such a statement? Are your friends avoiding you because all you do is whine, "I'm still in love with my ex.
" How do you get through the days and long nights when you're so miserable? Getting back together with the ex is possible, of course, depending on the details of the break up, but there's no sure fire answer for whether or not it will happen.
After giving yourselves time to breathe and think, the only thing you can do is let your ex know your honest feelings, that you don't want them gone from your life and would like to have another opportunity to make things work again.
Sometimes, the honesty and sincere expression of appreciation for what was lost is enough to sway the ex.
That is, unless, of course, infidelity was the issue behind the break up.
Infidelity is a trust-destroyer.
Whether you were the one that cheated or the ex was, trust is a privilege that is extremely hard to regain once broken.
Being able to trust someone is directly related to how safe a person feels in the others company.
If there is no feeling of safety and security, then the job of rebuilding trust is a long, arduous one.
Another point to consider, should the two of you attempt a rekindling of the love you once had for each other, is how to avoid the past mistakes and patterns that caused the relationship to devolve in the first place.
Because you are now in a position to say, "I'm still in love with my ex," does not necessarily mean either one of you learned from your hard lesson.
Hopefully, you did and can identify the specific problems that caused the break up.
Because, in order to not have history repeat itself, these issues must be identified and remedied.
Being in love is actually the easy part of the whole equation.
Keeping a romance alive and well is the tough part, the part that requires constant attention.
Unfortunately, in the case of rebuilding a broken love, you've got even more work to do.
What's more, it will take effort on both your parts to keep the lines of communication open, so that if a potential problem crops up, it can be dealt with before it becomes a deal-breaker.
Exhibiting your desire to change is not enough.
You have to actually make the changes and eventually, your ex will see that.
Your actions will speak for themselves and your ex will see that the changes are not only there, they are real and permanent.
That's because you went from whining, to taking positive action.
Actions are one thing, but saying the correct things will help.
Still, what really matters most is your sincere desire to change, because if you're only changing just long enough to get your ex back, then no amount of temporary change will make the relationship work.
If your changes are not permanent, then you are simply headed down the same path of heartache and misery.
Surely, you do not want to find yourself again crying, "I'm still in love with my ex?"
" Are you going around saying that, with all the attendant misery and feelings of failure that come with such a statement? Are your friends avoiding you because all you do is whine, "I'm still in love with my ex.
" How do you get through the days and long nights when you're so miserable? Getting back together with the ex is possible, of course, depending on the details of the break up, but there's no sure fire answer for whether or not it will happen.
After giving yourselves time to breathe and think, the only thing you can do is let your ex know your honest feelings, that you don't want them gone from your life and would like to have another opportunity to make things work again.
Sometimes, the honesty and sincere expression of appreciation for what was lost is enough to sway the ex.
That is, unless, of course, infidelity was the issue behind the break up.
Infidelity is a trust-destroyer.
Whether you were the one that cheated or the ex was, trust is a privilege that is extremely hard to regain once broken.
Being able to trust someone is directly related to how safe a person feels in the others company.
If there is no feeling of safety and security, then the job of rebuilding trust is a long, arduous one.
Another point to consider, should the two of you attempt a rekindling of the love you once had for each other, is how to avoid the past mistakes and patterns that caused the relationship to devolve in the first place.
Because you are now in a position to say, "I'm still in love with my ex," does not necessarily mean either one of you learned from your hard lesson.
Hopefully, you did and can identify the specific problems that caused the break up.
Because, in order to not have history repeat itself, these issues must be identified and remedied.
Being in love is actually the easy part of the whole equation.
Keeping a romance alive and well is the tough part, the part that requires constant attention.
Unfortunately, in the case of rebuilding a broken love, you've got even more work to do.
What's more, it will take effort on both your parts to keep the lines of communication open, so that if a potential problem crops up, it can be dealt with before it becomes a deal-breaker.
Exhibiting your desire to change is not enough.
You have to actually make the changes and eventually, your ex will see that.
Your actions will speak for themselves and your ex will see that the changes are not only there, they are real and permanent.
That's because you went from whining, to taking positive action.
Actions are one thing, but saying the correct things will help.
Still, what really matters most is your sincere desire to change, because if you're only changing just long enough to get your ex back, then no amount of temporary change will make the relationship work.
If your changes are not permanent, then you are simply headed down the same path of heartache and misery.
Surely, you do not want to find yourself again crying, "I'm still in love with my ex?"
