Talking to the Kids About Death Is Never Easy
The very young ones do not understand that their loved one is no longer going to be around for them.
That's not to say that they can't handle it, but they might not understand how depending on the age.
Telling the Kids is Never Easy When my grandmother, my little girl's great grandma whom she called "Nana Boo-Boo, passed away it was a hard time for all of us.
She was a rock that I'd depended on for years, and my daughter was so accustomed to seeing her and visiting her, that trying to tell her about her grandmother's passing was difficult for me.
I avoided it for several days, and that was probably not the right thing to do.
About two days after I got the news, I sat her down and explained that we wouldn't be able to go and visit Nana Boo-Boo again, and she asked why.
I could feel the tears already forming in my eyes as I tried to explain death to my three year old.
I did it as best I could and tried to put it into terms that she would be able to understand.
It was certainly no easy feat to accomplish, and by the time I was done, I was the one who was balling, and she was dabbing at my eyes with a tissue.
Kids May React Differently One of the things that I learned was that the kids looked to me to see how to react, and you might find that your kids are doing the same thing.
They are sad, but they don't always know how to express that sadness.
Kids are going to react differently too.
When my friend's spouse passes away, her two children - ages eight and eleven at the time - reacted like polar opposites even though both were very close to their father.
The older boy cried for what seemed like weeks straight.
The younger child seemed to take it more in stride and barely cried.
He'd always been the kind to hold his feelings inside, and I wasn't sure that was healthy.
I talked with my friend about it, and she agreed that trying to do a bit more talking with her son would be a good thing.
The good news is he opened up eventually, but he still was not as emotional as his brother did.
Kids are different, and you would do well to remember that during these hard times.
The good news is that kids can be strong and resilient.
Though it might take some time and tears, they - and you - are going to be able to come through this stronger and closer than ever.
That's not to say that they can't handle it, but they might not understand how depending on the age.
Telling the Kids is Never Easy When my grandmother, my little girl's great grandma whom she called "Nana Boo-Boo, passed away it was a hard time for all of us.
She was a rock that I'd depended on for years, and my daughter was so accustomed to seeing her and visiting her, that trying to tell her about her grandmother's passing was difficult for me.
I avoided it for several days, and that was probably not the right thing to do.
About two days after I got the news, I sat her down and explained that we wouldn't be able to go and visit Nana Boo-Boo again, and she asked why.
I could feel the tears already forming in my eyes as I tried to explain death to my three year old.
I did it as best I could and tried to put it into terms that she would be able to understand.
It was certainly no easy feat to accomplish, and by the time I was done, I was the one who was balling, and she was dabbing at my eyes with a tissue.
Kids May React Differently One of the things that I learned was that the kids looked to me to see how to react, and you might find that your kids are doing the same thing.
They are sad, but they don't always know how to express that sadness.
Kids are going to react differently too.
When my friend's spouse passes away, her two children - ages eight and eleven at the time - reacted like polar opposites even though both were very close to their father.
The older boy cried for what seemed like weeks straight.
The younger child seemed to take it more in stride and barely cried.
He'd always been the kind to hold his feelings inside, and I wasn't sure that was healthy.
I talked with my friend about it, and she agreed that trying to do a bit more talking with her son would be a good thing.
The good news is he opened up eventually, but he still was not as emotional as his brother did.
Kids are different, and you would do well to remember that during these hard times.
The good news is that kids can be strong and resilient.
Though it might take some time and tears, they - and you - are going to be able to come through this stronger and closer than ever.
