Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

Maintaining Healthy Relationships - 3 Ways

Most people, not only you, are insecure about their relationships. It's not just marital or significant other relationships that can be difficult. Maintaining healthy relationships is universally a problematic experience. Those who deny it are either very shallow or completely fooling themselves. The reality of living in this world is that we are not in heaven, and some even say we are in the other place.

What The World Is Really Like

Nope, it's not just you. Even nature in this world is better appreciated from a distance. There is competition and killing at every level of life. Except for human beings, who have free will, the world moves forward with instinctive self preservation violence. Amidst the beauty of nature the cycles of creation, preservation and destruction are continually working themselves out. It is an exciting and beautiful world because and in spite of its ever changing cycles.

It should be stated and recognized that man is capable of either being a part of the cycles and participating in all the violence, or standing above the spectacle. Man is not an animal. We're capable of reasoning things out and behaving in ways that are beneficial to each other and ourselves. We don't live in constant fear of having our possessions taken from us by force. In most cases we really don't even have to think about that. We're capable of creating.

Mankind Is Special

It isn't very important to decide here and now if man has evolved from the bog or is a special creation of God's. Personally I recognize myself and you as God's children with the unique ability of communion with Him (or Her). We are endowed with qualities that allow us to choose our destinies. We can reason, will and act. This conscious ability sets us apart from nature, when we choose. If we fall back on our instincts and fears we are no better than the animals in the jungle that kill or be killed.

Healthy relationships are not predicated on the behavior of two or more people. They are predicated on the behavior and attitudes of the individual who wants one. How you respond to what another person does or says is all that matters to you. If another person treats you well or treats you poorly you still have the full range of options to choose from. It is up to you to determine your own behavior.

Here are three ways to maintain healthy relationships:

Listen - really listen to what was just said to you and ask yourself what was meant. Most people react or respond to something or other that simply came out wrong and the person is too uncomfortable retracting or explaining what they meant.
Think - no matter what was said or how it was said you still have the ability to pretty much ignore it. I like the expression "your screw up doesn't turn into my emergency." We have the ability to feel compassion for someone else's error-caused pain, and we should be quick to use it.
Respond gracefully - when you are able to keep your wits about you the dilemma of another person is something you can relate to and feel for them. Even if they are striking out of habit it does not mean you have to become a victim of their rudeness by striking back.

Healthy Relationships Are Based On Love

No matter what the situation is always look for an opportunity to express love, compassion and support. No matter how someone is treating you always be the best friend they ever had and tell them, "I love you."

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