Everything about weddings these days is big.
Sometimes it even seems that scaling back is big.
And the insistence on unbelievable display seems to start with the proposal.
Wait! You have some choice about that! Here are three things your marriage proposal really doesn't need to be, three things that can prevent the simple heartfelt nature of what you want to say to your beloved from being clearly heard.
A marriage proposal:

1. Shouldn't be over the top.
   The question is over the top.
   You're asking someone to spend the rest of his or her life with you.
   That's momentous.
   Let the question be as special as it is.
   Your love is as outrageous as anything could be! You don't want to treat it lightly, but you don't need to hire the Good Year Blimp.
   Plan a simple outing and let the question and the ring be the focus of this magical moment.
   
2. Shouldn't be public.
   This is a private moment between the two of you.
   You want to be able to fall into one another's arms.
   You don't want to have to worry about offending her parents or your friends.
   And they can wait a couple hours until you let them know.
   Relax.
   You now have the rest of your life to let people know what's going on.
   But you only have this incredible moment together this once.
   Keep it private for just a little while! People race to call people, to twitter, to FB.
   Stop.
   The two of you are making a momentous and amazing decision.
   Enjoy yourselves.
   Enjoy one another.
   Cherish having a wonderful amazing secret, if even for a little while.
   People will be happy for you in a half hour.
   Right now, be happy for (and with) one another.
   
3. Shouldn't be gimmicky.
   I can't tell you how many stories I've heard of the ring being frozen into an ice cube (oh, and not melting!) or that in-the-bottom-of-the-milkshake-and-swallowed problem.
   It's such a sweet moment.
   You don't need to make it cute.
   It's profound, not cute.
   For the asker: It is enough that you stand there, heart and ring in hand and ask your beloved to marry you.
   It is more than enough; it is amazing.
   Know that.
   Trust that.
   Make a quiet personal moment and offer your commitment to her.
   Let the stars and fireworks be in her eyes and let the moment be focused enough that you can see that!

Set up a simple, romantic, easy date.
Know what and why you're asking and what and why you're offering.
Clutch her hand and the ring, if you're doing it that way, and get engaged.
You might want a bottle of champagne nearby to celebrate! Don't set a date for the wedding ceremony, keep the notes you made on why you want to get married for your wedding vows, don't plan the marriage.
Tonight, let your joy in one another and your hopes for the future be enough.
Because it is more than enough! Enjoy being engaged!