Are You Really Crazy? 3 Tips For Domestic Violence Survivors to Separate Truth From Fiction
The "you're crazy," "she's sick," "he's psycho" is a pattern that I have come to recognize as diagnostic.
That is, it suggests that I'm dealing with someone who reflexively will make the other person wrong, broken, less than they.
If you are on the receiving end of this "crazy-making" routine, then you probably know what I mean.
Unfortunately, many in this position begin knowing they are not as their partner alleges but over time, they themselves become confused.
I can hear it, feel it and sometimes even see it.
It's as though they have internalized the notion just to stop their own guessing.
And what a disservice they are doing to themselves and to their children.
Here are some tips for you to parse out truth from fiction.
1) Be mindful of the timing in which you are told that "you're crazy," or "you're mentally ill.
" If it is said "out of the blue" relative to you, chances are it's not about you.
2) Be mindful of the circumstances surrounding your being told that you are mentally ill.
If it is done when the person making the allegation needs to secure some advantage over you, then it's probably not about you.
3) Be mindful of the gains to the other person, by labeling you as crazy or with a specific mental illness.
If doing so gives them opportunities, rights or privileges that at the same time are taken from you, most likely it's not about you.
The "you're crazy" part of domestic abuse is as common and characteristic as is pushing, shoving, hair-pulling, kicking, punching...
It's another form of attack.
However, when you're on the receiving end, you may not perceive it as such.
If you are a victim of domestic violence and are being expected to wear the crazy hat, seek professional help to protect your sanity, before the damage is done.
That is, it suggests that I'm dealing with someone who reflexively will make the other person wrong, broken, less than they.
If you are on the receiving end of this "crazy-making" routine, then you probably know what I mean.
Unfortunately, many in this position begin knowing they are not as their partner alleges but over time, they themselves become confused.
I can hear it, feel it and sometimes even see it.
It's as though they have internalized the notion just to stop their own guessing.
And what a disservice they are doing to themselves and to their children.
Here are some tips for you to parse out truth from fiction.
1) Be mindful of the timing in which you are told that "you're crazy," or "you're mentally ill.
" If it is said "out of the blue" relative to you, chances are it's not about you.
2) Be mindful of the circumstances surrounding your being told that you are mentally ill.
If it is done when the person making the allegation needs to secure some advantage over you, then it's probably not about you.
3) Be mindful of the gains to the other person, by labeling you as crazy or with a specific mental illness.
If doing so gives them opportunities, rights or privileges that at the same time are taken from you, most likely it's not about you.
The "you're crazy" part of domestic abuse is as common and characteristic as is pushing, shoving, hair-pulling, kicking, punching...
It's another form of attack.
However, when you're on the receiving end, you may not perceive it as such.
If you are a victim of domestic violence and are being expected to wear the crazy hat, seek professional help to protect your sanity, before the damage is done.